This is my second pregnancy. My first child is only 13 months old, so you’d think the positives and negatives of pregnancy would still be fresh in my mind. Not so. There’s something beautiful that must happen in a woman’s mind after she has a baby. She remembers what her pregnancy was like, but the negatives just don’t feel as bad as when you were actually experiencing them. You think to yourself, “Nausea? Not a biggie. Stretch marks? Battle wounds. Hip pain? No problem. I can totally do this again”. While you’re not wrong, your body can and will do this again, you’re mind begins to remember exactly what comes with making a human being. And this brings us to: pregnancy brain.
I pride myself on being organized and having a photographic memory. In school, I read through my notes once and they’d be essentially memorized. This has also worked exceedingly well in my marriage. Matthew is very forgetful. He can never remember where he leaves things and heaven forbid I change the organization in a commonly used area like the kitchen. It takes him months to figure out the new system. So for the past eight years of our marriage, we’ve relied on my ability to remember most things.
As I’ve already written, we moved to Virginia roughly one week ago. Moving across country, for lack of eloquence, sucks. There’s nothing easy or fun about it. I can honestly say though that this most recent move has been the easiest in our five move history. That being said, several days after we arrived, bid fairwell to my Dad and Karen, and started unpacking, my wallet and keys went missing.
I went two days without panicking. I started looking in the obvious places and still it didn’t turn up. Finally I sat down and tried to remember when was the last time I had seen it. I remembered keeping it with me in the rental car we had, but not after that. So I called the rental car company. No luck. Then I checked our credit card statement and there was an extra $150 charge on it. One that neither Matthew or I had made.
Ok, now for the panic. I started canceling my credit/debit cards, canceling my checks, looking on the internet about how to replace everything that had been in my wallet. During all of this, Matthew and I had to run a couple of time sensitive errands. While in the car, Matthew accidently sprayed my leg with car oil that was in between the seats. I opened the glove compartment to get a napkin and out popped my wallet. Stunned silence from inside the car followed.
Did I mention that I still didn’t have my keys? To make what’s already a long story shorter, I found my keys that night next to my bed. I’d probably looked at them a hundred times in the past couple of days, but I didn’t remember seeing them.
If I were normally a forgetful person, these incidents wouldn’t bother me. But it’s like my super power is gone. I can’t remember anything! As I think back to my first pregnancy I do remember making lists for everything, including “take a shower”. Humbling and sad. Ah, how pregnancy and motherhood can bring you to your knees.